We use our eyes to fall in love and our hearts to love. Why? Because we fall in love with an appearance, not with the person sitting right next to us in the office, or in a line, or at the bar in a club, right across the taxi station or outside – smoking a cigarette. We fall in love with what we presume that person is, we fall in love with what we want him to be, what we imagine he could be. We fall for what he is willing to show us in the beginning, for what he offers as a reply to what we need.
Rarely, that person happens to be exactly what he seems to be like. Those are the extremely rare cases when we love while being in love.
We love after we discover the person close to us, stripped of all appearances, assumptions, illusions or inhibitions. We love her when we know she represents what we really want – maybe for that time in our life, or maybe for a lifetime. We love her fears, her qualities, her flaws, her success and her failures, because they belong to her and because, as long as we love her, they belong to us too. We love her because we love the way we feel when we are together, or apart. We even love waiting for her, because we know that each minute brings us closer to the happiness of feeling her close.
We love and are in love with the idea that he/she loves us back.